Wow, You’re So Tall

The inspiration for this post goes back to what pretty much everything in my life revolves around: being tall, so lets just start there. 

I’m gonna go backwards a little bit. 

My grandma (my dad’s mom) is about 5’10”. That was pretty tall for her day. My dad is the tallest of his siblings at 6’6”. His three brothers are all about 6’3”/6’4”. He has one sister who is 5’11” and one who is 5’7” (which is how tall my mom is but she thinks she’s 5’8”). ANYWAY, my grandma’s license plate was 2TALL4U and when she got rid of that license plate she gave it to me, and I’ve had it as a decoration in my room ever since. It’s been many of my usernames on different websites before and is now the name of this place to come together and talk about all things, including being tall. I’ve wanted to have an outlet to rant and rave about dating and clothes and the comments I get for a long time in hopes of creating a community of people who have been in similar situations. I don’t feel alone being a part of the volleyball world, but I know there are plenty of people out in the world who are going through similar things whether they are tall or not and I want to hear about it. 

I have always been tall. I was the tallest in my classes in elementary school, grew 5 or 6 inches between 5th and 6th grade which had me starting middle school at 6 feet tall. 

That was fun. Middle school is some of the worst times ever (you don’t really know it until you’re out of it), but you’re trying to figure out who your friends are, your body is changing, you’re changing, boys become interesting, there’s just a lot to figure out at 12 years old! Usually you’re trying to fit in. Well, I never really did. I stood out; literally. Walking through the crowds of the hallways I could see the tops of everyones heads. Made those hallways not feel so crowded so I can’t really complain. 

I’ve been stared at most of my life, because I am tall. I had to learn pretty quickly to be okay with who I was and am because a lot of people were constantly looking, and at 12 years old if you’re different from everyone else you can feel self conscious and outcasted pretty easily.

I am grateful for two things that I had that early in my life: my parents and the gospel. 

My parents were so good at messaging to me how great it is to be tall. And it is. I absolutely love it.

The second thing is the gospel, because in all of its teachings, something you learn super early is that you are a child of God, and your Heavenly Father loves you no matter what; and I knew that truth down in my bones and in the core of who I was. There was no reason to not feel confident in myself when I knew that my father in heaven loved me even if I didn’t totally fit in with everyone in middle school. I was happy to be different and I thrived on that.  

One other thing I am grateful I had growing up are the two friends I met in 3rd and 4th grade (who I still speak to today). They just so happened to also be tall. Not as tall as I am, but they were both above average in the height department. They made the staring and the comments not quite as bad.

Then, I started high school at 6’3” and grew another inch leaving me at 6 feet 4 inches. 

I started playing volleyball at the age of 8 or 3rd grade. I don’t think it really counted until about the age of 12 though.  Mostly because I sucked and my parents still make fun of me now about how quiet I was on the court. I never called the ball let alone tried to touch the ball and be part of the game and I couldn’t make my serve over the net unless I was standing at the 10 foot line. But I was tall and this was gonna be a good thing; and it was, because in the volleyball world I fit right in with all the other tall girls of the world.

When someone walks into a restaurant or an airport or a grocery store people turn and look, right? Right, but for me they wouldn’t stop looking. Most of the time people’s eyes go straight to my feet to see if I am wearing heels and then are even more shocked when I am not. I get pointed at too, like I’m a show in a Carnival. I get the comment, “wow, you are so tall” all the time. And can I just tell you all that is the worst comment ever for two reasons. It’s not a question and it’s not a compliment - thank you doesn’t really work as a reply, you didn’t ask me how tall I am, so all I can really reply with is, “I know” or a smile. I also hear comments in passing from people who think they are whispering (but they aren’t) about how tall I am. I’ve even gotten people, mostly guys, who walk up behind me and try to measure back to back “casually” without me knowing they are doing it. Trust me, I know. 

I am constantly aware of the people behind me in a crowd whose view I am most likely blocking like at a concert, or sitting in the front of a classroom, in a movie theatre (I know the seats lower each row down but I still feel like I’m in the way). When I am out with friends or in public and they are goofing off, I always had a (and still do) hard to joining in because I felt like I stood out since I always have people staring at me. There are a lot of ways I am confident in who I am, that is not one of them! Dancing around and acting silly with friends in public is something I am still trying to let go of. The staring always felt like it went on forever but that was my own childhood selfish thought process that everything was all about me, and I know that it’s not. People don’t really care, and if they do, why do I care what they think. Most of the time their judgments are more about themselves then they are about me. 

And then there’s the clothes. Pants, long sleeves, shoes, skirts, dresses, pretty much everything except a simple t-shirt were not made for tall people. I can’t buy pants at any store, I usually have to buy them online so they can be “extra long” thank you American Eagle. I can ONLY buy shoes at Nordstrom and dresses make me look like I am wearing a really long shirt. I’ve figured out my own style since I can’t always wear the popular clothes that are out at every store and cheaper because they are mass made. I’ve found the few stores I shop at all the time and figured out what works and become okay that sometimes the current style for pants is that it stops above my ankle and I’m not just “waiting for the flood” even though it looks that way. My dream is to have the hem of my pants drag on the ground, but you can’t always have it all. So if you want the in’s to stores I shop at, just hit me up! I’m happy to share!

I’m curious to hear about other people’s experiences with height. I shared these because I feel like they are the most common, but I am sure people have their own specific stories. Feel free to comment and let me know! I’m sure other people want to hear from you too. (p.s. you can comment anonymously if that helps) 

I’ve always felt like I’ve wanted to share these things with people because they’re not something lots of people think about and it is what has shaped me into me. Your appearance isn’t supposed to define you, but  being tall is who I am and I will be forever grateful for the lessons I’ve learned because of it. It has given me the confidence to stand up and stand out, always. I want to be able to share that confidence and support if I can, so lets talk about it!